Retreating to advance

Back online again, having returned from a weekend away, followed by a few days 'on retreat'. I didn't go with a lengthy agenda, other than wanting to reconnect with God. And I can honestly say that (on those terms) the retreat was a success - to the extent that I came home a little early, because I felt I'd done the work I needed to do.

The location was Harnhill Centre of Christian Healing, near Cirencester; the focus was a week of ministry, intended for church leaders - a combination of 'teaching', spiritual direction and prayer ministry, with plenty of space for personal reflection. Oh, and plenty of good food too! The company was good too, just a bunch of ordinary people from a variety of backgrounds (although in terms of church tradition, most were Anglicans), just wanting to connect with God. Most had stepped out of busy ministries and some were going to back directly to leading worship and preaching on Sunday. Whereas for me, it was more about finding a focus for my sabbatical, than a desperately needed break. Nonetheless, it was a very significant few days.

Much of the ground covered is personal and not for blogging about. But the focus for the week was Psalm 42, which begins 'As the deer pants for the water ...' (You may have heard my 'pants' story, which always comes to mind whenever Julia or I hear or read these words). It was suggested that the context for the Psalm is the exile, as the people of God languish in captivity in Babylon. This makes a lot of sense of the content, especially the desire to go and meet with God (ie in the Temple) and the sense of being surrounded by hostile, mocking voices (where is your God if he is unable to protect you or rescue you from captivity?).

In one of the sessions, we were encouraged to draw a picture, based on what we felt God was saying to us. This kind of thing makes my heart sink, not because I don't think pictorially, but because I can't draw! Anyway, the work of art I came up with was based around the notion of captivity, which can take a number of forms: physical limitations, the impact of our memories, hostility from those around us. There are other possibilities, but all these are present in the experience of the psalmist. But the refrain which runs through the Psalm (and into Psalm 43) is this: 'Put your hope in God, for I will yet praise you, my Saviour and my God'. The invitation is to look up - not down, not around, not backwards - not even forwards. But to look up.

One more thing: there is tragic twist to this tale. Because if this an experience of exile and if the memories of the past are true (rather than poetic creations), then it is very likely that the writer never did get to worship again in the Temple. He would have died in captivity. Does that invalidate his hope in God? I don't think so, because his hope was in God, rather than in a specific outcome. When we face new circumstances, where the old ways no longer work, then we need to find out what God is doing in this place, at this time. Because wherever we find ourselves, we can be sure he is there and is up to something!